Kyp's Job Review

So basically, Kyp was talking about how he's been busy writing job reviews... and so I told him he should just make stuff up and just entertain the person reading it... y'know basically do the same thing that allowed him to pass Marketing in College.

So this was my suggestion for his review:

Kyp Pilalas- Kyp is a critical part of our _____ department. His bright attitude and great sense of humor adds to our wonderful work environment.... but don't let that fool you, under that goofy glasses wearing face is the brain of a cunning system programmer. Raised in a small farm town just outside of baltimore Kyp realized his dream at a young age and never stopped striving towards it. He fought against the tide in a world where his kind of people weren't accepted by those around him. Expected never to be anything but a farm hand this young boy had dreams... running away from home and joining the navy Kyp challenged everyone there. Eventually losing his leg during a salvage dive in russian waters Kyp wandered the ocean floor fighting off sharks and octopi until he came upon a small ocean city. Stumbling through the strange land he eventually met a friendly mer-person who brought him safely to shore. However, he found himself coming to the surface in a time he didn't recognize. Luckily at that exact moment a yuong teenager ran into him wearing a strange life-jacket looking vest. He told the man to come with him into a car which once it hit 88 mph travelled back to his home time. Now in his own time Kyp could beginhis future. Unfortunately his family had now moved to the big city, having spent all their money attempting to find him. The strain of losing a child tore his parents apart; Kyp chose to live with his mother... he began high school... quickly falling in love with a tom-boy wearing a lot of pleather. He studied computers until he could learn to change his schedule to match hers, and then turned on the fire alarm so that water rained upon the school from the sprinkler system... must've been a leak in the pool he said. And then suddenly, and without warning the whole thing turned into a real life game of hungry hungry hippos. and that's how I hacked the gibson.